Killing Monsters: Imperfection
2013
grrrrr.
The whole idea of killing monsters … is ummm, it involves killing. The concept that there is a struggle and some fighting involved.
Clearly it’s only for the brave of heart.
It’s kinda gory and messy.
What’s even more complicated is when the monsters live inside us.
Not monsters from horror films … monsters better known as hang ups, hooks, cages, issues, baggage … “stuff”.
If we were honest we ALL have something we are giving to God and letting Him work out.
The battle is never what I call “fun” but the victory is exhilarating. Real freedom is contagious … especially because God’s presence is all over it.
We don’t battle alone … God draws us to places He has gone before us. He is always revealing to heal not expose. He is for us, regardless if we feel it in the moment.
Really in the moment it can feel like death. But LIFE comes from death.
Four months ago God challenged me to take a picture of my stretch marks and tell them I loved them while I was preparing to write an article for Destiny in Bloom, On God and Your Body, and it made me sick to my stomach every time I looked at it.
I wanted to LOVE it because I knew He wanted me too.
But the truth was I HATED it. I HATED them. They were a constant reminder of imperfection. Something outside of my control that I could not change. I could tell God I loved my body, but I would ball up every time I would try to tell Him I loved them.
Why couldn’t I have been like my Mom with NO stretch marks … I would whine to God.
Then God would smile at me.
I would want to get frustrated but He would still me with His voice,
“You are so beautiful. You deserve to receive my love … you deserve to love yourself. You really should consider not talking about yourself like that.”
The monster squirmed. The monster fought. But the Monster was no match for God.
No match for His love or His truth.
Monsters lose power when you choose the truth … because …
MONSTERS are not REAL.
Monsters are illusions and lies.
GOD IS REAL.
So how do you kill monsters … with the truth. You let light in all your dark places and darkness loses it power.
Imperfection told me I was less then. I was ruined. A part of me was ugly.
Truth said beauty will never be your weight or looks or outward appearance. Beauty will always be your heart first. The way you see it … will determine what you see.
So four months ago I took a marker to my stomach and called it beautiful and then I wrote the names of the children I so dearly love that enrich my life. I would not trade ONE of them to not have stretch marks. Their lives make me grateful for every mark.
If they make me less than perfect. I’ll take them.
Because it was never my job to be perfect … But I do get to be in love with the ONE who IS!
God reveals the monsters … I get to kill them.
Because monsters??? Who’s got time for that?
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I LOVE you and THIS!!!
Truth. Light. Power. You gave me an honest encounter of the physical meeting the eternal. (Which is where the monsters are slain.) It is not just that you are “no man” (LOTR reference) it is that you are a fully equipped child of the most high walking out your inheritance! Love you & your heart.
Marissa, I so love that in our weaknesses, He is so very strong! I love your picture! The battle field is littered with slain monsters tonight, and I will go to bed celebrating God’s amazing victories today and what is to come! Well done, amazing woman of God, well done!
thank you for this; wonderful insight……
So funny that God led me to thank my uterus for my 4 children before having my hysterectomy. I didn't hate it. I was grateful. And then He told me it was time to say goodbye to my uterus. I value my body and the work it has done, and God has done such a huge work in me…I am slaying the Monster of Perfection each and every day.
Good stuff, Marissa. Thank you for sharing and letting the Lord use your battle for freedom as a weapon in our individual battles as well. God is daily reshaping my ideas of beauty, perfection, etc. as well. Love you friend!